For Just $100 Dollars, You Can Avoid a Groping by the TSA (WSJ)

Discussion in 'Lounge' started by Drew Wilson, Mar 20, 2012.

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  1. Drew Wilson

    Drew Wilson AKA IceCube Staff Member Moderator Contributor

    Hate the full-body scans, pat-downs and slow going at TSA airport security screening checkpoints? For $100, you can now bypass the hassle.

    The Transportation Security Administration is rolling out expedited screening at big airports called "Precheck." It has special lanes for background-checked travelers, who can keep their shoes, belt and jacket on, leave laptops and liquids in carry-on bags and walk through a metal detector rather than a full-body scan. The process, now at two airlines and nine airports, is much like how screenings worked before the Sept. 11 attacks.

    To qualify, frequent fliers must meet undisclosed TSA criteria and get invited in by the airlines. There is also a backdoor in. Approved travelers who are in the U.S. Customs and Border Protection's "Global Entry" program can transfer into Precheck using their Global Entry number.

    "It's a completely different experience than what you're used to," said Matt Stegmeir, a platinum-level Delta Air Lines Inc. DAL +2.36% frequent flier who was invited into Precheck when it opened at his home airport, Minneapolis-St. Paul. Besides zipping through security screening quickly and easily, Mr. Stegmeir noticed another difference: TSA agents at the Precheck lane are usually smiling.

    More...

    Because no terrorist would ever possess $100 at any one time!
     
  2. Atheist Icon

    Atheist Icon Member Established Member

    Is this more of a reverse prostitution?

    No, wait, more of a prostitute who demands money without touching...what is that? Non-fulfillment?
     
  3. Tic3

    Tic3 - Staff Member Moderator

    You must meet one of three criteria:

    1. You must be an elected official (congressman, senator, etc.)
    2. You must meet income eligibility guidelines (only people earning over $300,000 per year qualify)
    3. You must be willing to pay the annual membership fee of $50,000 per year

    or something like that
     
  4. HelenaP

    HelenaP go luath.. céanna go luat Established Member Contributor

    Delayed gratification...
     

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