How often do you whale on the monkey

[Mels_Smileys45]

Please select one choice from above, we all know youre a tosser!

[crackerjacker]

i like this subject :)

[Malakai1911]

how often do you punish the midget.

thats my current favorite euphemism

[Mels_Smileys45]

I will refrain from calling my friend a midget. Hes a little sensitive about such things

[fleecy]

ok... how about "shaking hands with captain happy"?

[Kyle06]

hmmmm I'll let your minds go wild..

[black_magiic]

it fell off :(

[fleecy]

sounds like a job for snap-on tools :)

[Mels_Smileys45]

Frankly, Im a little concerned that no one has said anything about rarely = 3 or 4 times a day.

[shawners]

This should be deleted due to the fact that nothing can cum from it.

[black_magiic]

This should be deleted due to the fact that nothing can cum from it.
you should be beaten for that

[fleecy]

this could get messy....

[Mels_Smileys45]

This woman at work was telling me about her teenage son. She told me about how often he took showers, sometimes 3 a day. She siad it was because he wanted to stay clean. I didn't have the heart to tell her that her son was beating off in there. Denial is such a wonderful thing

[fleecy]

beats having to wash the damned sheets all the time :)

[Mels_Smileys45]

Yah, I bet my bed sheets must have looked like a shooting gallery when I was a teen.

[fleecy]

that's why you keep hand towels by the bed :)

[Mels_Smileys45]

an old sock as a spoo rag

[fleecy]

great... athlete's cock :)

[Excrement_Cranium]

Jesus, I can't pull off more than once a day.


Well... not often anyway.

[evilmegaman]

God have mercy on me... I have never had an urge to play with myself. I have tried but don't like it :P

[fleecy]

holy crap, batman! my bullshit meter just blew up!

[moneoa]

It's always a common thing to click on some weird link on the net and find yourself in the middle of smut and perversion, I just never thought it would be here...

[shawners]

Yah, I bet my bed sheets must have looked like a shooting gallery when I was a teen.

more like a crime scene.

[black_magiic]

holy crap, batman! my bullshit meter just blew up!
haha I agree I think someone is bullshitting us

[nukehella]

This is a sticky subject.

[fleecy]

haha I agree I think someone is bullshitting us

just like that old saying- there are two kinds of people in the world those who masturbate and those who lie about it :):icon_tong

[Excrement_Cranium]

In a recent study, it was found that 80% of men masturbated in the shower. The other 20% sang. Oddly, almost 90% of the men sang the same song. Anyone know what song it was?

[Auggie2k]

Jingle bells?

[ducttapeBigSexy]

Masturbation is like procrastinatin - it's fun at first, but in the end, you're just fucking yourself...

[kokanezub]

dam when my girl friend wont give me nothing i swear i can sit home and do it bout 4-10 times a day i once did it 12 times . my zubee was about to fall off.

[fleecy]

In a recent study, it was found that 80% of men masturbated in the shower. The other 20% sang. Oddly, almost 90% of the men sang the same song. Anyone know what song it was?

was it the oscar mayer song? :icon_cycl

[CureMyTragedy]

Just remember this about masturbation..... 95% of people do it and the other 5% lie about it :)

[mfgbypooter]

only stop to eat and go to the bathroom?

what are you nuts?

I like busting a nut and plopping a turd at the same time.

Best simultaneous O you can have.

*

[fleecy]

talk about coming and going....

[mfgbypooter]

if it's white your coming and if it's yellow your going


toilet etiquette

if it's yellow let it mellow, if it's brown flush it down.

*

[Pirate_RRRRRR_IIIIII]

Record in one day, 5 times,
average weeklly spank sessions, 6 times
watching a bitch sucking off a horse, priceless

[mfgbypooter]

whale on the monkey?

Is that like, Ahoy matey! Thar she blows!!

Stop that blubberin'

*

[Excrement_Cranium]

was it the oscar mayer song? :icon_cycl


Being a song singer, I am not bestowed the power to let loose our secret chant. I agree with pooter, crank one out while you pinch one off.

[mojo-ris-in]

I'm wailing on the monkey as we speak:icon_cycl See My eye bulging?

[mfgbypooter]

I don't whale the monkey but I do bop the bologna.

*

[Excrement_Cranium]

I polish the knob.

[stoopid]

Where exactly in the bible does it say a man can't fire off some knuckle children in the privacy of his own neighbor's living room while his neighbor is at work because I don't have a DVD player? Well, I don't know where it says it, because the bible is way too long to read.

[uselesscrap]

Where exactly in the bible does it say a man can't fire off some knuckle children in the privacy of his own neighbor's living room while his neighbor is at work because I don't have a DVD player? Well, I don't know where it says it, because the bible is way too long to read.

Don't tell me, you joined ZP just because you found a subject you could relate to?

[skankito]

Jerkin the gherkin.

[cletis_van_damm]

i like the manual labour

[tackdaddy]

pounding the pud,fighting the one eyed monster

[Mels_Smileys45]

Where exactly in the bible does it say a man can't fire off some knuckle children in the privacy of his own neighbor's living room while his neighbor is at work because I don't have a DVD player? Well, I don't know where it says it, because the bible is way too long to read.



I like you

[fleecy]

switch hands and call it a threesome :)